Christmas at Home

It's the end of December already and we survived some birthdays & Christmas. Braden turned 2 on December 22 and we celebrated at home with family.

We spent the holiday at home this year and it was wonderful to share Christmas with our boys at our house. On Christmas Eve we went into Chicago and saw the holiday window at Macy's featuring Mary Poppins and then on to the Museum of Science and Industry. They had a beautiful display of Christmas trees from around the world.

Zane loved the museum and had a ball in the Idea Factory play area. Braden was so excited that he refused to take a nap. It is our tradition to go to this museum on Christmas eve but it's been a couple years since we've been able to. We took this picture in front of the model train set.

We had a nice time at home establishing our own traditions this year. In the picture we are telling the boys about the birth of Jesus and looking at our Nativity set. Christmas day was exhausting for us because the boys were very hyper & excited about all their new toys. They played all day long and never wanted to stop! It was a tiring day for us as the parents!

Friends in a Blizzard

Winter has really hit us here in Chicagoland! We were hit with a foot of snow on Friday. My friend Karen Huber & her kids came to visit at the same time so we were snowed in together. We posed Zane & Jack on my back porch in the midst of the snow.

You can see below that Braden loved being near Baby Ella. He was so cute when he tried to say her name.

Thanksgiving

Last week we went to KC to spend Thanksgiving with the Richards. I didn't take many pictures, we always seemed too busy.
Here I am with Steph & Braden under my new blanket. I went shopping at the crack of dawn on Black Friday & I got a great deal on it.



This is a great photo of Braden. It's hard to get him to stay still long enough to capture a picture. I love his smile.



Zane and Braden loved playing in the hot tub with their cousins.

Zane is 5!!

Zane had a Scooby Doo birthday to celebrate turning 5. No party this year. He wanted one but I didn't want the work & I wasn't sure how much he would really enjoy it. I made him a Scooby-Doo cake which he loved! We took the kids to Chuckie Cheese for dinner on Saturday to celebrate. He has been talking constantly about his birthday. I took him for his 5yr checkup last week. He is 40in tall which is 5 % and 39lbs which is 50 %. Joe thinks he's all muscle. He's definately a chunk!

Boys & Toys

So it's November already, where did the summer go?
This photo shows Zane's first trip onto the roof with Joe. Zane LOVES being up on the roof and never wanted to come down. He found the Christmas lights and talked Joe into putting them up.



My boys enjoy their toys very much. We are all enjoying this light board that Joe's dad made for Zane. It had been in storage for a while and needing a little reworking before the boys could play with it. They both love to flip all the switches and control the lights.

Autumn in IL

We have spent much of October visiting our favorite pumpkin farm- Tom's Farm Market and enjoying their Fall Festival. Zane loves jumping in the giant pumkin and feeding the animals in the petting zoo. We all love the apple cider donuts!

Another Soulfeast

I had a wonderful weekend at another Soulfeast retreat. This was my second time attending this women's retreat. It was so nice to spend time with God without the usual distractions. The retreat was held at the Osthoff Resort in picturesque Elkhart Lake, Wisconsin, about 3 hours from home. Soulfeast is about pursuing each of the spiritual disciplines as described by the book Invitation to a Journey by M. Robert Mulholland Jr. I focused on the discipline of scripture for the weekend. I didn't take my camera with me so I have no pictures to go along with this post, just good memories.

Today it's time to get back to the "real" world. School is out today for Columbus Day and my car won't start so we are trapped at home all day.

Labor Day at the Orchard

We had a great time apple picking this weekend at our favorite orchard- Royal Oak Farm. Now it's time for the baking & eating!

More Pictures from Banff

A family photo in Banff

A closeup of Braden's scabbed nose

Vacation Pictures

We are back from Banff National Park in Canada.
Here are a few highlights from the trip.

Downtown Banff

Nicole & Zane at the Botanical Garden in Banff

Nicole, Braden & the Grandparents taking a breather after hiking to the Lower Falls at Johnston Canyon

Finally a decent family photo at Bow Falls in Banff

We had a great time at Brookfield Zoo last week! Zane and Braden showed a lot of interest in the animals & Zane especially liked the monkies in the primate house. We were on the go the entire time we were there except for lunch so we saw a lot of animals. Zane certainly never wanted to linger at any exhibits but both of the kids did great and I was pleasantly suprised.

Zane, Blood & Cheerios

We had a tough morning- it involved Zane, blood & cheerios.
I was still dozing in bed trying to catch a few more Zzzs when Zane came up to me asking me to get the "red" (blood) off his feet. He had cut his foot & it bled a lot before he came to tell me. There are now bloody footprints all over the house. Most of the blood was on the hardwood so I could clean it up. I don't know how he got the wound & he didn't seem to be in any pain.
Next up he dumped out the whole box of cheerios on his green table for breakfast. When he picked up some of them, many more fell on the floor. I argued with him & punished him for over an hour before he finally picked them all up. He is so obstinate & I was quite annoyed all morning. He has been quite difficult lately.
We had guests over the holiday weekend and here are some pictures from their visit. Joe's brother Josh & his family came to stay with us for a few days. The kids had a lot of fun together.

I'm back

I have terribly neglected this blog for months! I have finally found some energy so it's time for an update.

Today is so much better than yesterday and it's all about my frame of mind. I was tired & felt yucky yesterday so I wasn't much fun for the boys to be around and we had a really rough day. I feel great today and we have had a good time so far. Not much going on at the moment. Zane is in afternoon summer school for a couple more weeks- yeah!! I relish my 3 hours of freedom every afternoon. He is such a super control freak- can you imagine having to argue about everything?! He has to have everything his way, what shirt he wears, what cookie he eats. It's very exhausting for me some days.

We aren't doing anything special for July 4th next week. We have a friend that has a BBQ every 4th and the Village of Roselle's fireworks display is almost in their backyard so we go go every year to see that. Last year Zane got very scared of the fireworks display so it shall be interesting this year to see how he does.

We are going to Banff, Canada in just a few weeks. We'll be gone July 29-Aug 6. I'm getting into planning mode now and it will be nice to have a change of scene. We'll be in the Canadian Rockies and we're traveling with my parents. Joe wants to go white water rafting and I hope we can go on a horseback ride. We'll probably also do lots of hiking and site seeing with the kids. It's only a few weeks away but it feels like it's eons. I'm looking forward to being in the mountains.

Happy Spring

We had a nice quiet Easter at home this year. We saw our family over spring break last month so we didn't want to travel again so soon. The Easter egg hunt we attended on April 8th was so cold and quickly over in 2 minutes.

This picture is of Joe walking home from the park with the boys.

Today we had Braden's evaluation with a speech, developmental & occupational therapists. I was pleased to find out that he is doing great! He's on track and even ahead in some areas. He isn't talking much but he is doing about 12 signs so we understand each other pretty well. Braden is a little behind with his vocalizing but that may just be his personality. He hasn't done his vomiting thing for over 3 weeks now. The OT suggested it was a growth spurt that made him very hungry so he would overeat and not understand the full feeling so he would throw up.

The picture below is of Joe & Braden in our back yard.

This Week in My Life

Here's just a quick update for anyone who cares. Joe did get his raise that he'd been waiting so long for and he's content with it. YEAH!! It was the minimum that Joe wanted but enough to keep him with his company. We are very blessed and it's nice not to be tight on money. We even bought a new notebook computer so we can now be mobile and enjoy the internet anywhere!
Joe is at a conference in Annapolis, Maryland this week so my dad is here to help me out. Joe has another conference at the end of the month in Germany. He's hardly gone anywhere for business in the last 8 years and now he has 2 trips in one month.
Braden hasn't thrown up in a whole week! It's been wonderful, I hope he's over this problem. We are going to have him evaluated by a speech & occupational therapist to see if the vomiting is a sensory issue.

Family Week

Braden loves to climb up and sit on chairs. We were at Zane's preschool for a Family Night celebrating literacy last week. One of the classrooms had a computer game set up for the kids and Braden toddled over and sat down to try to play, but mostly he just banged on the keyboard.
The school had 7 rooms set up with a different theme in each one. I enjoyed reading Brown Bear, Brown Bear to Braden and showing him all the characters. Zane tried many of the crafts and it was a nice time.

My parents were visiting so they came along with us and got to see the new building for deLacey.

It's actually snowing today. Spring is only a few days away so this has to be the last snow of the year. It's pretty but it's a reminder of the isolation of winter.

My parents are seriously talking about moving to be near me, possibly by next year. My dad is retiring in June but my mom is going to work for a few more years. While they were visiting me they went to Sun City in Huntley and picked out what house they want and got lots of information about the area. It would be so nice to have family nearby to help with the boys.

Zane's a Tough Nut

Our meeting went fine with the child psychologist yesterday. We met with the director of intake for the behavioral program at the pediatric development center at Illinois Masonic in Chicago. She said Zane definitely does NOT have autism which had been a real worry of mine. Basically he's a tough kid with behavioral issues. Many of his behaviors are trying to elicit a reaction- especially his actions toward Braden. He had hearing loss and delayed speech at age 2 so he developed behaviors to cope with that and they still continue. We need to crack down and be very structured & consistent with him. We were reaffirmed that we are on the right track with our parenting of Zane. She mentioned that he would likely be a much tougher kid with different parents. She recommended working with a specialist in children's behavior to help us deal better with Zane. I am very interested in doing that. She is going to see if she can recommend someone in our area so we wouldn't have to drive all the way to Chicago.

I've been thinking more about going to back to work but there are some major roadblocks. The main one is finding a daycare that will take and keep Zane. I spoke with Zane's teacher today and mentioned the idea. She said she doesn't know how I do it- staying home with Zane & Braden. It seems very significant to me when she says that because she works with the toughest kids at the school. Zane's teacher said she thought the daycare thing would be tough because he would likely get quickly kicked out for his behavior.

I've got a friend date tonight! Yeah to dinner with Brandi!

Gluten is Evil...Or Not

Our appointment with Illinois Masonic is today at 1pm. Joe is coming home from work so we can all go together. I don't have my hopes up really, just wondering what will happen.

I am trying a gluten-free diet with Zane. Gluten is in wheat, barley & rye flour so no cookies, cake or bread. I'm going to give it a month and see if there's any improvement in his behavior. A friend of mine said she saw great improvements in her son's behavior and she talked me into trying it. Life has been tough with Zane so I'm about willing to try anything. We are now into week 2 of the gluten-free diet. It's been pretty easy so far. I found rice pasta for Zane and he loves all the popcorn and cheese puffs he gets to eat. Also I stocked up on lots of fruit, kiwi, berries so he is very happy about that. The only thing he misses is cheerios & cereal bars.

I haven't emailed anyone or blogged in quite a while. I was just trying to figure out why and I guess I feel like there's nothing positive to say so I don't want to say anything. Zane continues to be a constant source of frustration and exhaustion for me. 3 Bradens would be easier than 1 Zane.

Joe and I have been talking seriously about me going back to work and putting the boys in daycare or finding a sitter. We've been discussing this for an untraditional reason- we don't need the money (although it's nice) but I do need to get away from Zane. I don't know what kind of job I would even pursue or where to begin. What's a girl with an MBA and no experience to do? I don't really want to leave Braden either. Since he's over one I could live with him in daycare but I do enjoy spending the day with him.

I had planned to go to a MOPS meeting this morning but Braden is sick with a runny nose & cough. This means I will miss again- I think I've missed more than I've gone this year. MOPS is a nice opportunity to put Braden in childcare and sit down & eat brunch and talk to adults. Oh well, my life's not that bad. I guess I'm just in a complaining mood.

Odds & Ends

I'm posting today but I have nothing to report. Just boring old life as usual.
Time seems to be creeping by. I want to fast forward a year or two and get Zane into Kindergarten and Braden into preschool. I want to buy that new house in Crystal Lake as we have been discussing for years.

In our quest to find a diagnosis & help for Zane we have made an appointment at Illinois Masonic for next month. Their program sounds like it's focused on behavior modification and parent training and not on drug therapy. Joe finds this particularly appealing since he is against using drugs to treat Zane.
Zane is our budding artist- he loves to paint as long as he gets a brush and doesn't have to use his fingers.


Joe and I had a few discussions this week about having more kids. I'm against and he's for it. He's not pressuring me and he understands why I'm in no hurry. If I knew I could have a girl I would be much more interested in having another. I feel fairly confident that I can only have boys so I have to be ready to have a 3rd boy before I want to get pregnant again.

President's Day- UGH!

I'm all for honoring Washington & Lincoln but why does Zane have to be off school today?! I never got President's Day off school- at least I think I didn't, I don't really remember. Why, oh why does Zane have to be home?

I probably sound like a terribly spoiled mother but really I'm just surviving at this point and having Zane home all day Friday & Monday is extremely draining on my limited emotional/physical resources. I had a sitter a few hours Friday so I got to take Braden to his Baby Signs class and got a couple things done. Today it's just me & the boys. Zane wants/needs to be entertained all day and he doesn't take naps anymore. I really need to strategize some activities & crafts for us to work on.

I'm starting to think Braden has an eating disorder! If he gets too full he throws up. He can't seem to stop himself and wants to eat all the time. I don't think it's serious enough to go to the doctor but I am watching mealtimes closely with him.

I want to thank the 2 people who actually read this blog. Not Joe because he never reads it. Shout out to Karen H & Brandi! Thanks girls!

In other news...

I believe we have decided against the Partial Hospitalization Program (PHP) at Children's Memorial for now. We are going to reconsider in a few months. It feels too intense to us at this point. Zane just turned 4 and so he has a lot of development ahead of him. We are looking into some other area hospital programs and still considering our options. We were told that the PHP at Children's would most likely result in medication for Zane. We aren't ready for him to be medicated yet. I am starting to be more open to that option but not quite there yet.

Joe's grandfather died yesterday. He was an honorable man of God who will be missed. He leaves quite a legacy, he had 5 sons who all had kids so there are many Richards around the country. My favorite memory of him is at my wedding when he married Joe & me. Here is a picture of Grandpa from his 80th birthday party last year. He is surrounded by his great-grandchildren.

Joe is turning 30 on Monday! This is going to be an extremely low key event. Joe does NOT want a party or any recognition. We will have a sitter and go out to dinner & perhaps a movie.

Braden is a sick little guy again. I can't figure out what is going on with him. One day he's fine and the next he's throwing up and crying. He is walking all the time now which seems to make him very happy. The downside is that he falls a lot and cries about it.

I didn't make any New Year's resolutions when the year began. I'm thinking about a few I should make now. I need to cut way back on my sugar/junk food. More important- I want to reconnect/reaffirm some friendships. I have a few friends that I haven't spoken to in months and I want to make "dates" with them. I just need to get over my phone phobia and make some calls.

More Zane

Today I kept Zane home from school and we made the trek into Chicago to visit a social worker at Children's Memorial Hospital. Our pediatrician had recommended that Zane be evaluated by specialists and referred us. The social worker we met with today recommended that Zane partake in a partial hospitalization program to get at the root causes for his behavior and find him the best treatment. This program is in Chicago, over an hour away. It's 7-10 days long and it's all day, from 8:30-3pm. The logistics alone are giving me a headache.
This is so difficult for me to deal with. I don't know what to do with a special needs kid. Being Zane's mom is the toughest job I can imagine. I'm definitely overwhelmed but I guess that's just life.
Here's a cutie pie picture of Braden on his bench. It cheers me up a little.

Joe's in Utah & I'm Not

Joe's in Utah and I'm at home with my boys. It sounds like Joe is having a wonderful time. He got to go to an NBA game, a Sundance movie & ski and snowboard in the mountains for 4 days kid-free.

I got to stay at home without him and all the help he provides with the kids. I got to deal with Zane's meltdown at church when he refused to go into the 4 yr old room. I got to put him to bed last night amid screams because his towel was in the wash and he wanted to hang in its regular spot in the bathroom. I got to watch and constantly discipline as Zane took much pleasure in pushing & hitting Braden. Zane told me that he doesn't want Braden to walk and he puts it into action by knocking over Braden every time he walks by.

One wonderful highlight of the last few days- Braden did his first sign. He has been signing "light" and looking up at the light. It's so adorable to see him understand me and try to communicate.

I got the call today from Children's Memorial Hospital that they can see Zane tomorrow and evaluate him. We've been waiting 2 months to hear from them. I'm hopeful that this is the beginning of a process that might lead to some answers and solutions for Zane's behavior.

Winter Time Blues

I'm now in the middle of the winter time blues. There's not much to do these days with Zane. Playdates just seem impossible. Zane bullies other kids and I have to constantly watch and correct his behavior. It just feels easier to stay home than go out in the cold. I have only a couple of friends that are willing to have their kids around Zane (or that I feel comfortable with).

This week has been quite slow so far. Zane was off school on Monday so we had to find something to do. I had MOPS today which I had missed for 2 months.

Zane is now quite enjoying our XBox. His daddy got him started and Zane quickly caught on.

I just started a Baby Signs class with Braden and it's been fun. I'm trying hard to remember to sign the few words I've learned. I really hope that Braden will pick it up and start communicating with me. I'm especially concerned because Zane talked so late and I want to be sure the same doesn't happen with Braden if I can help it.

I need a vacation!

We are back from our Richards family vacation in Orlando. I'll let the pictures do most of the talking.

Our front row view of the parade at Magic Kingdom.

Zane & Joe surfing
Our double stroller came in very handy with 4 little kids.

It rained at the end of our day at Magic Kingdom.
The kids loved the carousel.

9 days in KC

We are home at last! We had a good time in Kansas City despite the cold we all seemed to pass around. Some highlights- Seeing our families, the boys getting to interact with aunts, uncles, cousins & grandparents. Zane enjoyed swimming in his grandparent's hot tub. Joe & I got to go out on New Year's Eve. Zane & Braden loved eating at Fritz's Railroad Restaurant in Crown Center where a train delivers your meal- it was so fun we went twice!
The boys got to spend a lot of quality time with their grandparent's since we were there for 9 days.
It's time to prepare for our next adventure: Disney World! We will be going there next week with Joe's family. I think we will go to 2 Disney parks and 2 Universal. Hope it's not too much chaos with 4 little kids.